Our world is hyper-sexualized, why is that? This week, Kent looks at the created order when it comes to sex and helps us explore a theological way of understanding our experience that makes sense of both the science and the spirit.When you give at Harmony, you are investing in life change and are Advancing the Kingdom! GIVE TODAY, text any amount to (859) 459-0316 to get started (or give online @ my.harmonychurch.cc/give .
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OPENING ILLUSTRATION: When I was in middle school was the first time I had a friend that told me he had had sex. I remember it pretty vividly because none of us knew anything about that world and he told us everything there was to know. He told us that this girl had spent the night and they had sex…. He said, “she slept on the top bunk and slept on the bottom bunk, it was pretty awesome” Ha…
For a long time, I thought sex meant you were just sleeping in bunk beds…
It’s kind of funny, but I have a feeling that more of us have messed-up ideas about sex than we know.
Today, I want to take a stab at what sex is and what it was designed for and I want to do it in a different way
Normally, I build an argument in my sermon and then try and give you some kind of answer/resolution.
Today, I want to come more direct and break it into two parts. This is my Ted Talk on Sex…
Part IThe Creators Intention – Why Sex
[Next Week] Part 2What does this mean for us? – The Implications
so, let’s jump into this. I know some of you may not believe in a creator – you may believe we just evolved over time to be the way we are, but just for argument’s sake, let’s look at what has been the traditional idea of Christianity and Judaism and see how it lines up with our actual science of physicality
In the book of Genesis, there is this description of God creating our physical reality
God creates man – Adam the first man- God forms together some clay into the shape of a man and breathes into it- muscles and sinew form, tendons and bones, brain matter fires up and man is born- God sends Adam on this safari to name animals and to allow him to see if there is any kinship between them- but it’s found that none of the animals can end the loneliness of Adam- Genesis 2 tells us the story of what God does next
Genesis 2:21-24 21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs[a] and then closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib[b] he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” 24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
I want you to notice something, there is no marriage ceremony mentioned here, there is no “vow” taken
The created order was that man would leave his family of origin and unite in one flesh with a woman – what we would call a wife
Paul will reference this union years later when talking about how careless the Corinthian people were when it came to sex…Listen to his words…
They lived in a culture where you could go to a pagan temple and worship, you would pay to have sex with a temple prostitute…
he says this
1 Corinthians 6:16 16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.”[b]
Paul is making the argument that when you have sex with a person you become one with their body – you enact the biblical idea of marriage
This is SIGNIFICANT for us to understand
The idea of one flesh occurs when a man and woman have sex. This is what it means to be “married” Marrying means to unite two things into one
ILLUSTRATION: Think of a woodworker marrying two pieces of wood together – typically they are creating a union of the two pieces. Or marrying a certain chicken dish with a particular wine.
I’m trying to take you back to the original meaning of these things
I know this is a lot to take in, your mind may be spinning about the implications of this – especially with the way our culture treats this…
What’s interesting is Science knows that our bodies are even created for this kind of union or bond when having sex…
When your body reaches the peak in sexual activity your brain releases a concoction of chemical hormones.
Oxytocin – the “bonding” hormone, this is the hormone that mothers and babies release when breastfeeding that causes them to feel a deep connectedness.
Dopamine – the pleasure and learning chemical, your body is creating a reference to where it can find deep pleasureProlactin – this hormone gives you a sense of satisfaction
Serotonin – this hormone produces a good mood
Oxytocin is so powerful that, for women, their brains will continue to produce it for a period of time after finishing having sex.
While researching this, I came across this quote that I thought was interesting…
This is at least one secular – non-biblical conclusion: “If you think about it objectively, the idea of risking your life and health to birth what’s basically a parasite living in you for nine months, which you then have to raise for the next decade, is a lot of work. Mother Nature may be ‘tricking’ us to make sure the species doesn’t die out,” -Kayt Sukel (psychologist).
In other words – if you look at it from the outside, it looks like there is some mechanism trying to get us to want to have sex.
I would differentiate and include stay in a committed relationship
Our world has dissected relationships from sex-Sex is demoted to a purely physical act/urge-but that’s not even what the science says
If it was just dopamine, prolactin, and serotonin then we could say what is happening in your body is connecting you to sex alone.
But when you add Oxytocin, it means that your body is trying to connect you to sex WITH the person you are having sex with.
But our world doesn’t have a framework for this. The Implications of this are huge…
CLOSING ILLUSTRATION: What has your sexual history and past been? I know, most of us have grown up in this hyper-sexualized culture that views sex as no more than a bodily function. Not a device for connecting each other. So, most of us have a sexual history, that when we start to put some theology behind it, can make us feel incredibly guilty. Can I leave you today with a passage from the Gospels?
Jesus is at a well, thirsty for a drink, in the middle of the hot summer sun when a woman comes up to the well to get water – the time of day alone lets us know that by all religious rights of the day, she would have been an outcast – maybe even considered a prostitute. Jesus asks for a drink and they have this beautiful dialog.
Listen to the dialog Jesus has with this woman…John 4:16-1716 He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.”17 “I have no husband,” she replied. Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. 18 The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”
This woman had, at best, a colorful sexual past. Jesus doesn’t ignore it, but neither does He make it the thrust of his conversation. I actually think He brings it up because it was the thing that brought her shame. I think he brought it up, so He could bring healing to it. Because He had just told her
Vs 10 & 13-14 10 Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.” 13 Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”
Jesus was there to bring her healing, not to berate her for her failings. Today, if this sermon has reminded you of some pain from your past, could I just offer you what Jesus offered? I think sometimes He reminds us of our pain, so He can bring healing. He wants to give you living water, not leave you stuck in shame…
Come to Him today!————————–